Monday, March 19, 2007


I have long cherished the ambition to stop working on tedious industrial products and get involved in something more satisfying, something with human interest, something that increases the sum total of human happiness... In short, sex aids.

The opportunity arose last week. One of my friends managed to wear out her favourite toy and asked if I could fix it; reluctantly, after several fractions of a second of arm-twisting, I agreed.

On inspection all that was wrong with the poor thing was that the wires were broken - it was one of the ones that has a control box and a variety of plug-in, erm, attachments. These had all been used to the point where they were intermittent; a simple enough fix - some more flexible cable, some heat-shrink tubing, some user-testing [cold shower] and the job's done. Unless, of course, you have the sort of mind that opens the control box, looks at the inevitable 12C508 PIC, and thinks "PIC? I'm not having any of my friends having sex with a fucking PIC..."

So, a couple of hours later we have a new improved AVR version. From eight 'programmes' to forty; pulses, sequences, sawtooths, triangle waves, variable speeds...

Source (Zeus) code for the AtTiny15 can be found at

Enjoy ;)


  1. Words fail me. Easily the BEST and most valid use of geekery to date.

  2. I was discussing the operation of the vibrator with a friend, someone who had better remain nameless.

    Crem: "As you can see it has different speeds, and some modes which drive the motor in bursts that get faster, and so on"

    Mr X: "I see... And bursts that get slower, of course?"

    Crem: "No... Have you ever had sex?"